When I stand before God at the end of my life,
I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say,
"I used everything You gave me."
~Erma Bombeck

March 17, 2014

Monday Musings...Messages...

At the top of my blog here you will see my favorite saying. It is by Erma Bombeck. "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me. "" I get the message that we should use our talents that God has gifted us, over and over and over again. It's like it is my calling to carry that message through. My blog, my creative endeavors and my business are being built on this.

I have known deep down for a very long time that I was meant to carry on my mother's creative legacy. Last fall, I was going through photos on a cd that my sister scanned for Mom's memorial service. I found these newspaper clippings featuring an "emerging artists" article from the Mesa, Arizona Sunday paper.

I'm pretty sure my mother agrees with my thoughts on Erma's quote and she wants to let me know this. Because if you look closely at the caption underneath her painting of lilacs it says:

"Lilacs" by Barbara Whitlock. Whitlock says talent should not be neglected. "If you have a talent, it is a gift from God. It is given to you for a reason, and it is a shame not to pursue your talents, no matter what they are." she says.

Pursuing my dreams, carrying on the legacy and using my talents...

January 27, 2014

Monday Musings... Coming out of hibernation

(image courtesy of stock.xchng)

Hello! I've been gone from the blog for a while. I have been creating some, but not really blogging. I hope you will bear with this post. It is just something I needed to write to finish off this time of turning within myself.

For the longest time I have been kind of hibernating. As everyone knows, my mother passed away and I had major jaw surgery for sleep apnea in 2009. It took months to recuperate physically and emotionally, well we all know that pain never really goes away. It gets better and softens around the edges a bit, but never goes away.

At the beginning of 2010 I celebrated my 40th birthday. Two weeks later, I found out I was pregnant with my third (and last) child. I was just getting things under control when this beautiful surprise set me into kind of a tail spin. Of course, he is my blessing. I was just completely surprised and caught off guard.

At that time, because my youngest was in kindergarten, I was volunteering at the girls' school. I made a few mom friends there and I did my best to keep up with the "You are a stay at home mom. You have time. You should volunteer for everything!" mentality. When what my heart was saying was "you should create, create, create!"

I ruffled a few feathers when I decided to resign sharing home room coordinator responsibilities for my daughter's kinder class. It was middle of the year and my sweet friend that I was assisting was a very capable seasoned HRC. I resigned via email, politely stating my reasons. In hindsight, I wish I would have had a conversation with my friend before resigning. I missed the fact that she was extremely busy with other volunteer positions and it was her busiest time. The email was sent to 4 people. Only one responded. She responded sweetly, telling me she understood completely and wished me luck in my creative endeavors. But the damage was done. I blackballed myself so to speak and this was confirmed the following fall by a friend of mine at the time. She told me I was right, when I had assumed this out loud to her. Of course I was 8 months pregnant at the time, so I didn't really care. I had no energy for volunteering or creating!

When I was pregnant with Kyle. I started whittling down the volunteering even more. I am one of those moms that is kind of a homebody with my babies. I don't like to run here and there, dragging my infant carrier with me. Now I know if you have older children, some running around just cannot be avoided, but my daughters were old enough to understand that some of their activities were going on hold for a few months.

Enter the beginning of my hibernation. It started when I had had enough of trying to explain myself and resign from a volunteer position from a group my daughters were in. Knowing that I was not going to want to take Kyle with me everywhere, I started trying to resign when I knew I was pregnant. It wasn't until he was 5 months old I finally got my point across. I admit that I might not have gone about it entirely the right way, but I had been trying to kindly quit for quite a while. Long story short as a result of issues with the group, I had to quit abruptly to be heard. It was ugly. I lost what I thought at the time was a friendship, when really it should have been an acquaintance relationship. The emails and voice messages that flew my direction where the nothing short of nasty. I shared a lot of personal stuff with someone because I thought she was a friend. This stuff was thrown in my face in the worst way. My character was attacked, my marriage even became fair game. I was even threatened to watch out in public if I ran into this person. The hibernation began as a result of this. What was said to others about me? How could I go to my children's activities? I guess this is what the goal was. For me to feel small and scared and to question myself. I shut down. My closest friends knew this, but I didn't really until recently.

I learned so many, many things from this incident and now after 2 years, I am finally feeling back to myself (maybe even better!). I learned that not all acquaintances are true friends. I learned what a real and true friend is. I learned to use better discretion when it comes to what I share with others. I learned that my husband is my greatest supporter. Over and over he told me that the people who really, really know me, know my character and what kind of a person I am, wouldn't believe anything less than good about me. I learned that it doesn't really matter what other people think about the dynamic of my family and household, it only matters that it works for us. I learned my children don't need to have more than one extra curricular activity to fit in and be happy. I learned I don't have to be everyone's all, I only have to be all I can for my family. And they are so much happier for it. Life has it's ups and downs and this was a down I needed to go through to learn all of those things.

So, now the so called hibernation is coming to an end. I have felt in the past couple of months the burden I was putting myself under lift. I am reconnecting with my "real" friends. I am stronger both physically and mentally. Best of all, my creativity is beginning to soar. I am really excited that I am no longer fearing creating art. I don't and won't hold myself back from sharing the talents I have been blessed with.

I have been blessed with many tools to help me on my creative path. I have my own crafting/art space, a great camera, computer, printer and support from my family and friends. I'm looking forward to sharing my creative endeavors with you. I can't wait to experiment and try new things. I can't wait to meet more creative people. I am wide awake, stretching and ready to go. No more hibernating for me!

November 20, 2013

Watercolor doodles...

I have had an extra child home during the day this week. My Nikki has the flu. With any luck, she will be back at school tomorrow and there won't be anyone else at home sick. Her being home has stranded us to the house, so between taking care of her and Kyle and doing washing and cooking and other household duties, I decided to pick something new to try out to help get the creative juices flowing. Besides, just look at that lonely workspace!

It was just begging to be messed up! 

Here is what I did. I pulled out my long unused opaque watercolors and my watercolor brush. I love that brush. With a toddler, it makes for a quick and easy clean up. Not to mention, it is fun to use! But I digress. I set to painting a page full of rectangles.

Doesn't that table look better being put to good use?

After I had a page full, I used a Micron pen to draw doodles and borders in each rectangle.

I also used a white and silver Gelly Rolls. After a bit, the pens didn't want to cooperate. I don't think they liked the water colored paper. So I ended up using my brush Pitt pens. 

Here is my end result. It makes me smile just looking at it. I had so much fun, I had to do another.

This time, Nikki helped me choose and place multiple colors on the page. And I figured out that a Uniball pen worked better than all the others.  Here is an Instagram pic of my finished page. It's kind of blurry, but you get the idea. Did I mention, you can follow me on Instagram? Just click the button in my sidebar. I'd love to have you!

So, I would love to say this fun and relaxing project was entirely my idea, but I must give link love where link love is due. I found the idea on Pinterest. Here are links to two lovely blog posts that demonstrate this technique...


(I love how she used it as a scrapbook page background!)

I hope you will try this fun activity out. It is very relaxing!

Happy creating!